Why You Shut Down in Relationships (Childhood Trauma Explained)

We don’t shut down as adults because we’re broken.

We learned it.

As children, shutting down was smart.

It was how we survived those perfectly imperfect parenting moments—when love felt uncertain, when connection felt unsafe. We disconnected, went blank, numb, empty. We built walls to protect our heart.

That survival strategy was a gift back then.

But here’s the problem: as adults, the same strategy boomerangs back. We replay it against ourselves. We mistake today’s struggles for “adult problems,” when in truth, they’re echoes of the feelings we buried as kids.

The good news? Once you understand this pattern, you can finally break free from it.

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